Doodler Dandy

Posted: November 10, 2009 in about me, drawings, the annoying shit I do, work


I have a confession to make to you all.

I can’t..

I can’t seem to stop myself.

It’s a..COMPULSION.

I HAVE to do it.

I don’t feel like a whole person unless I’m doing it.

Making the swirls…

..the..mmmm…the circles…

..the smooth strokes…

Yes, folks.

I’m a doodler.

No..no..

Not a DIDDLER.

That would be my dad and, honestly, I’d rather keep that part of my life a secret.

Oh.

Um.

Oops.


No, I’m just a doodler.

When I’m in a meeting, I doodle.

It’s not like I’m not listening (it’s EXACTLY like that), it’s just that I can’t stop drawing stupid shit on my notebook when other people are talking about something that I should probably be listening to because it might be important and relevant to my job, OH LOOK A LADYBUG, and oh shit I have to really get an oil change for my motorcycle soon and you know what? I think I’m gonna draw me a scary octopus.

I probably shouldn’t go to meetings.


What the fuck was I talking about?

Oh.

Doodling.

So, normally there aren’t pet ladybugs walking around in meetings craving my affection

..so I end up drawing shit.

What do I draw?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Let’s take a look at some of the ACTUAL shit I’ve drawn in my notebook during meetings:

(click to enlarge the images)


Apparently, I have some type of fetish with comets and shit that’s flying at you.

Don’t judge.

NEXT!


Um.

* cricket

Not a clue, there.

The best I can guess with this thing is it’s some sort of crazed octo-squid-alien. I really have no fucking idea where I was going with that.

NEXT!


Oh..look. I actually know what this one is.

We were talking about one of our software agents that installs on a computer.

So, of course, I drew an agent.

Like, you know, a secret agent.

With creepy trenchcoat and everything.

Then I went to the trouble of writing ‘Agent’ just in case maybe someday archaeologists find this notebook and are all like, ‘What do you think? Hieroglyphic symbol of their leader?’ and the other guy would go, ‘No..it’s just an agent.’

Then to clarify this brilliant art even more, I wrote the word ‘DOODLE’ over my fucking doodle so now the archaeologists are all thinking, ‘Oh this is just shit’ and throwing their notebooks down and then going to check out naked pictures of Laura Dern.


NEXT!


This is an alien that was obviously ripped off from ‘Toy Story’ except I was all like, ‘oh shit, Copyright infringement’ and added 10 more eyes. SUCK IT, PIXAR!

NEXT!


I got nothin.’

So, that’s just a few snippets of shit that’s sitting in my notebook.

Comets and aliens and agents and octo-squids and flying boxes and faceless men riding giant dildos and shit.

Welcome to my head.

Scary shit, isn’t it?

Hi. My name is Rodney.

And I’m a doodler.

I wonder what the archaelogists will think.

Moog out.

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