The Bitch Who Crowned Me

Posted: January 28, 2008 in awards

Well…they keep rolling in…


..not my crabs.

(I’ve used lighter fluid and a thing I like to call the “peanut-butter-Mister-Wiggly-dog-snack” to take care of those)

It’s another award.

The Offended Blogger has bestowed upon me this fine piece of art, deftly crafted using Microsoft Word:

My blog offends her.


I’ll put it over on the side right next to…say…OOOHH! I’ve got the spot!

I’ll put it right next to “The Friendly Site Award” or the one I have with the f*cking cat and the dog.

Anyway…”Offended” went so far as to create an entire article about me.

Of course, it’s entirely factual, and actually includes a picture of my brother!

This is awesome news…

…as I always thought I was an only child.

It turns out, now, that Sean Penn is actually related to me.

As soon as he gets back from bitching about whatever that f*cking pussy is bitching about now (seriously, asshole…why don’t you just F*CKING MOVE – and take Adam Baldwin with you), I’ll look him up and try to extort some money from him.

Thanks, OB.

On another note, my “Dear Moog” section isn’t shaping up very well.

I’ve had no takers thus far looking for advice.

This means that I either have really bad judgement, or really smart readers.

I’m guessing it’s the former.

No offense.

Except to you, OB. For you, I’m happy to offend.

  1. >Well aren’t you the popular one!Congratulations on your award! ;o)

  2. Casdok says:

    >How big is your head now?!!Nice one!!

  3. moooooog35 says:

    >PP: Looks that way! Whodamidgetman now?!Casdok: It’s big enough to fit comfortably in the palm of my hand. Thank you for asking.

  4. bRaT says:

    >Is that the tenth award I hear you’re getting? they do just keep rolling in don’t they? :)I’m not going to photoshop you an award or anything… but your blog is spectacular… your sense of humor is priceless… thanks!

  5. Prin says:

    >Congrats! You offend me all the time too. Awww.

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